Din Raat Kardi Sughra (SA) Tere Naa De Vehn Akbar | Matamdari Pursa @ Sh...

I think I am in deeper trouble than I thought I was, here is the thing, in this season it looks like there will be nothing but western winds through the English channel and strong ones too, meaning in this narrow route I have to zigzag a manytime every hour to get just a bit of distance done and without a plotter or any charts and by myself it will not only get too dangerous but it will also take its toll on me, in this season with strong headwinds, this is not a one mans job to get through the channel, even experience sailors say it is crazy and they wouldnt do it alone on themselves, all the sailors here are either in pairs or more, honestly I dont think I can do it on my own, I think I only have two options, the first is to take the northern route but this time go even further north to later attack the headwinds and have the distance to clear Scotland or abort and I do not want to abort, damn this is a difficult decision to make, I actually dont know what to do right now, I think I have to give the northern route another try but the weather is no joke up there and its cold and its getting just colder by the day and with no weather report its even harder, I started with two autopilots and one broke in my first attempt in the north and I am left with just one more and if this one breaks may God forbid then I am in real trouble, I mean it is impossible without an autopilot and only one man, cant be done but in the same time I dont want to abort, I dont want to go back to Sweden, tonight I tried to leave this port and head out but the strong headwinds wouldnt allow my engine to even get out of the harbour lol so I had to get back here and now I am sitting here thinking what the hell to do, well there is another option but thats just I think a bit out there, I could need another person traveling with me so while one can rest the other one can take over for a few hours, you need two men to cross the channel at this time of the year, but again, the third option is a bit out there I think, so only two options remains, the northern route and the second options I dont even want to think about getting back to Sweden, so I think I will give the first option that is getting back north once again, another thing is, this boat is no racing boat that can break the headwinds easy, its not just that kind of boat, only few kind of modern racing boats can break winds like that, I dont want alarm anyone but I think I will give the first option another try and if the autopilot breaks down then who knows where I will end up at, I just hope it wont take me to the Artics lol there is a fourth options too I think but thats almost just as unlikely as the third one, that is to stay here a couple of months till the weather changes till we get rid of these constant western winds like in spring where it changes to eastern winds so that it would be much easier to cross the channel into the Atlantics but I dont know what the authorities here has to say about that and then its the money issue, no matter what I am in deep deep trouble, bummer, here is what I am going to do, I will head north again and make a new try and I can only pray to God this last autopilot doesnt break and see what happens, the trip will take perhaps two three weeks longer if everything goes well and nothing breaks down, what I have to do is to go and supply with more food and head north again, I think New York just have to wait, baby, if anyone can be a buddy and get me at least a new autopilot would be nice, with a reserve second one that would increase my chances to this alot more probable, in either case I have to give it another try tomorrow, I am gonna buy some more food then I have to set sail again, I mean where in the hell is the US Navy when you need one.